Artwork by Kevin Francis Grey
Being a blogger and an avid facebook user, makes me a content creator and also contributor to the dialogue that forms culture.
As soon as I press "publish", I am sending forth a wave of thought, theory, emotion into what I think is a black hole, technically not really aware* of who is reading what I write, googling who I am, and even.... yes, even, showing this screen to their friends over a glass of wine, sending this link on in an email, tweeting about stuff I might have posted . I'm not saying this happens with this blog, all I am saying is that I live life unawares of who knows, recites, or carries my thoughts and ramblings in their conciousness or subconciousness. (*Google Analytics makes me slightly aware of who reads this, and where you are, but I can only guess who is specifically reading this.)
Essentially, I am projecting a version of myself into the world. I almost typed "virtual world", but that's not true. I live a lot of my life in front of a computer, in front of networks of chips and data and wires that talk to other computers, and as soon as I type "www" into that little address bar, and I choose to upload or update, the distinction between what is physical and what is virtual is somewhat blurred. The difference between a book and a blog? You're probably just holding a laptop while you read, instead of a hard cover. "Friend" is such a loose term these days, being called such a thing online means that I'm no longer subjected to a code of loyalty or honour that would apply to me after building years of rapport with you in the flesh because, hey, we just met and exchanged banter over the weather at the bus stop. Difference is, I can't touch you through the screen, but I can certainly hurt you if I choose to. ("Rani really wishes harry high pants would wear deoderant before he starts his daily commute.")
But, is my public persona in pixelated black and white the same as who I really am? I can honestly say that I have a better idea of who I am in since I've moved overseas, and it can sometimes take a retrospective look at my photos and what I have written on here in the past to really make all my adventures and achievements to date sink in to keep gathering these little modules of self, and process them into a clearer picture of me. But do other people know?
My facebook persona is, admittedly, a slightly manicured version of me. Primped a little, polished a tad, and shaped and filed just so. This blog is, partially, an introspective insight into me. (Hardly anybody reads it, so I don't concern myself too much with topics, or get too selective about what I write.) These platforms are just like CV's - with the right key points, layout, and buzz words, I can create myself into a much more desirable candidate. Candidate for what? Friendship? Book deal? Life partner?
Who knows. Not "who knows" as in "I don't know who" but as in "Anything could freaking happen as a consequence of this shit, so best be prepared by putting my best foot forward. Now, smile goddamit."
Aren't all social networking (blah, hate that term) contributors just waiting for a peeping tom (or jane)/SN consumer/ stealth stalker to snap to attention at some explicit detail in their latest witty status update/trail of wall post conversations/hipster photo of latest big night out/self indulgent blog article?
It's like posting something is the non-thinking person's equivalent command of "Discuss" as ordered by a lecturer in an end of a semester exam essay question.
"Did I look uber cool or like a douche last night? View photos. Discuss."
We have literally turned into the generation living by the mantra; If there's nothing worse than being talked about, it's not being talked about (on Flicker forum or Facebook/Skype/Hotmail chat, complete with LOL and OMFG-did-you-see-his-hair-I'd-tap-that-Insert-winking-emoticon-here.)
So, in meeting new people, and getting access to their digital facade, how much am I really learning about them? Probably not a lot. And too much at the same time. Can I judge someone by their electronic cover? Yes (like they judge me). They obviously want me to. So when I meet them again, do I not have every right to assess if their public persona matches the person put in front of me, and test them on their actual knowledge of whatever the fuq they claim to be soooooooooooo into at the moment? "Woah girl, y'all haven't lived until you've seen the Fuck Buttons live. Looove them! But their last tour was so much better than this latest tour. So commercial." Cue photo of them in their fake librarian glasses, and adidas originals high tops.
That's funny. Because I just googled you and found your flicker account, and apparently 3 months ago, you were ranting on about the picture you took of the front cover of the latest Taylor Swift album claiming her to be "like, my hero." Bet you forgot the password to THAT account a little while ago.
Harsh? Step back and reflect. Ok. Now admit it. You do this shit too.
So - people I exchange business emails with/dude I just met/ lady I interacted with once and am at liberty to accept friendship request from/ bartender I hear about from friends that have just stared at you all night and we just drank wine and googled you - I ask;
Who are you? Because my recollection of you in comparison with your profile picture leaves me terribly confused.
No comments:
Post a Comment