The psychology of going without Milk

You know you've been in The Netherlands too long when you look in the office fridge for milk, find out there is none, and start going through the 5 stages of grief.

1. Shock and Denial - "What do you mean the interns forgot to buy milk? That can't be true!"

2. Pain and Guilt - "Maybe I should have said something earlier?"

3. Anger and Bargaining - "You mean, I'll have to go get Milk?! That's not MY job! If I give you 2 EU, will you go down to the store and get some milk?"

4. Depression, Reflection, Loneliness - " *sob* But I don't want black coffee. I remember what milky coffee used to taste like. It's not the same without you, milk."

5. Acceptance - "I'll be ok. Maybe there'll be milk in the fridge tomorrow?"

The little jokes the city plays

I was cycling around the city yesterday on my day off, and I rode past the Westerkerk which is right near the Anne Frank house.

It was chiming a little tune, and while I was speeding down the street, dodging tourists, gliding past the canals, the tinkling followed me.

I tried to place the song and melody.

Then, I swore that I had it worked out.

"Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole.

Very suiting since it was Valentines day.

The new direction from the usual

"The day your life changes starts off like any other day..."

This is a quote from something I watched and I can't remember what.

But ain't that the beauty of magic?

Appears out of nowhere, stems from the seed of things planted ambiguously,or unintentionally, and the universe just went to work behind your back while you ate dinner, took showers, drank beer and slept a little.

Je ne l'aime pas.

It comes in waves.

But when it comes, it's quite a strong feeling.

It passes, but it returns often.

The annoyance I get when I realise my mother was wrong and should have let me take French in highschool instead of Chinese.

Which I failed.

Even though I regularly cheated.

Everything cool is either German or French.

Bah!

Australian summer...

Howzat, members area, Ley ley, Australian open, Rod Laver arena, Nadal,came home drunk, blah blah blah...

I remember what it was like now... and I feel bored already.

Danger zone

A colleague just said the exact same thing I was thinking, about a highly personal matter.

It freaked me out a little bit.

"Get out of my head...," I told her "It's not a safe place to be."

The Fear

I am kind of afraid of my future.

I remember Australia and then I get nolstalgic and homesick.

And then I remember other things about Australia and I am glad I am not there.

But then I walk outside of my apartment and I feel like I don't belong here at all.

So I wonder what it's going to be like to be 32 year old me. Which is only 2.5 years away.

Because the 27.5 version of me was afraid of the future for different reasons. And she had every reason to be.

Amen

image courtesy of PostSecret

Can someone please put this on a freaking billboard?!

Or multiple billboards around the world?

Or on a compulsory higher education curriculum?

Kids with jobs

“The most sophisticated people I know - inside they are all children”

- Jim Henson


Late twenties and early thirties... and We are just kids. With jobs. And that makes us awesome.

I'd like to be the kid that got to market this as their job.

TomTom records Bert and Ernie's navigation voices from AmsterdamAdBlog on Vimeo.

The other 99%

I have literally come to the age where 8/10 people I know are getting engaged, pregnant, married, or adopting puppies.

(6 engagements this year?!?)

The rest are in significant relationships or too blissfully happy in their careers to notice any of these things happening around them.

And me?

Ummm.... errrrr... yea. Hmm.

Suit up

Indisputable fact #1:

Every male looks better in a well-fitted suit.

Even the worst dressed male in the world.

Makes me think twice every time.

Indisputable fact #2:

Every male can look hot with the right hair cut and a well-fitted suit.

Winning combination. Fool proof.

The reality

The opposite

This is the categoric description of someone who is not me.

It's the last line that gets me.

"I know exactly who I am."

But I know this person in real life.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH. Your ego is getting in the way of legibility.

Dutch Colleague: We need to talk about your copywriting.

Me: What's wrong with the copy?

Dutch Colleague: This word is wrong... and this one... and this one.

Me: There's nothing wrong with it. (reading) It was written by an agency in the UK, I checked and corrected it, and had this checked by our boss... you know, the American one. He's approved this.

Dutch colleague: But shouldn't this word be in the past tense? I don't think it makes sense.

Me: Are you honestly asking me to correct my writing?

Dutch colleague: Well, I just want to know why you used this word instead of another one? It doesn't sound right.

Me: Is english your first language? Have you spoken it for the last 26 years and written it and earnt a business degree in it in the last, say 5 years?

Dutch colleague: umm...

Me: Right. I'll be at the coffee machine.

I eat my words.

**** Post Script to the last post I just wrote. *****

Apparently the answer is in here to the question "How to tell if a "dutch guy is interested." "

If you google it, this blog is one of two things that comes up.

And it leads to this old post.

But the answer isn't very good.

And I have no further insights.

I'm sorry for letting the team* down.

*The team being women everywhere around the world that might ever like a dutch guy. There would be a few of us on that team, I think.

I'm VERY sorry, the answer's not here. I wish it WAS.

I just did a google analytics report on this blog, just out of curiousity, where people are coming from, etc etc.

Then, I ran a report to see how people found this blog.

Here are a few keywords some people have been using:



Pay attention to the last key word search results:

I think it's hilarious that someone found this blog by using those key words. I didn't realise I had any content on here relevant to that topic.

I really don't mean to make an example out of whoever found this website using the keywords "How to tell if a "dutch guy is interested" " however, I have a message for this person.

If you had gone through the archives of this blog a little more, and gone through the history, you may discover that the answer is definitely not here.

And not likely to ever be here.

I am hopeless at that thing called dating. And even more so when it comes to dating dutch guys.

And, call me cynical but I don't think the answer to that is ever likely to be on the internet.

You'll have to work that one out yourself, like the rest of us.

However, when you do, feel free to drop me a comment, and tell us how you did it, and I'll publish it on here.

:)

Village to village

I think the Universe is trying to tell me something. I think it's trying to tell me that I belong in a Village.

Villages that start with the letter "A".

How is it I can move to the other side of the world, pretty much unassisted and have no qualms about it, but the thought of moving to Sydney freaks me out because of it's apparent pace, price and pretention?

Meanwhile, you can't swing a bike light in this town without seeing someone who looks kind of interesting ONCE and then running into them online or in person and then figuring out where they fit into the fold.

Careful what you wish for...

Little document, massive importance

Aaaaaah, the passport.

I keep mine in the same place in my apartment, regardless of how disorganised I may be with the rest of my life.

Last night I went to dinner at my friend Adam's place, and after about five minutes of sitting at his dining room table I noticed his passport on the ground. When I handed it to him he kind of casually tossed it aside somewhere.

I alway remember when I lived in Australia, I always booked travel and thought of my passport as an after thought. Usually it was expired, and I had to pay the exorbitant rush fee to have to reinstated within the time frame of which I needed it to go travel. I could probably name about 3 people I know that have had to do the same thing.

Day to day life just didn't require having to know where it is, how old it is, and how full it is.

Here, in Europe, I am always reaching for the thing to prove my identity - in fact, I know the number off by heart and all the issuing details.

It's much for the same for everyone I know here. I am pretty sure everyone I know would know exactly where theirs was if I rang them right now.

It's just another way life differs here - with intercountry travel being so easy and at for some people, a daily thing (my old boss commutes from Amsterdam to Brussels 2-3 times a week), toting that little booklet is just like carrying a bank card or packet of cigarettes.

I could probably safely say I could let mine gather dust as soon as I went back home.

No culture, No future

An ad placed in the New York Times by disgruntled dutch artists

NO CULTURE-NO FUTURE

Dear art/culture lovers and defenders

Black day
We invite every organization/institution, big or small, related to art and culture to cover the facade of their building with a black material tagged with a white painted symbol "X". This black material could be a cloth, a curtain or garbage plastic bag, any thing as long as it is black.
This is a protest against the radical cut in the dutch cultural sector and more specifically a protest against the way it is handled by the government.

It's your turn to act
In the past weeks we understood that most of the people outside our field are not truly aware that the government jeopardize the art and culture of tomorrow. Therefore every artist, individual working in the art/cultural context and every person who are concern about the future of culture and art are invited as well to cover their house window in that same way.
The urban landscape of the Netherlands would be modified for these days and reveal to its inhabitants the diversity and dynamism of their city.We shouldn't underestimate a national action and the repercussion of awareness that it would bring to the citizens. Come, join and spread the word.
Let living art and culture be major actors for the growth of our consciousness and our economy!
Join the movement, make it happen!

Two minds... one exact thought.

I've just spent some time catching up on snippets of news on my favourite (aka my only) english news source on dutch a current affairs.

They provide rough translations on certain press stories around the country on a daily basis, with opportunity to comment on articles.

Here are some of my favourite headlines to date - see if you can think of the words I am thinking of once you read them:

- Fear of foreigners 'understandable and justified', says Verhagen
Tuesday 28 June 2011

- Wide support for new integration policy
Monday 20 June 2011

- Multiculturalism must go: Donner
Friday 17 June 2011

- UN 'greatly concerned' at Dutch foreign policy shift: NRC
Thursday 16 June 2011

- The Netherlands needs migrant labour, parliament told
Wednesday 15 June 2011


If you guessed "narrow minded" and "ironic" , you would be right.

It's so weird: people in my office are lovely to me, and I wonder if that's because they are educated and more worldly.

These articles make it feel like I am living in a place far more redneck than Queensland when I walk out on the street, and it's probably a little bit true, but as people keep telling me, Amsterdam and it's population are not representative of the rest of the country.

I don't feel like this in general (that I am surrounded by bigots on a daily basis) but the general atmosphere around these parts is that you are either an anglo saxon dutch local who speaks perfect accentless dutch, or you aren't. Clear cut distinction which gets you various types of treatment.


Here are some classic lines out of various sections of the aforementioned articles:

-The Netherlands will need some 250,000 workers by 2020 to offset the effect of the greying population, a government commission was told on Wednesday, the Financieele Dagblad reports.


- Three-quarters of the population supports the government's new policy on integration, according to a poll on Sunday by Maurice de Hond.

- The poll also shows that 83% of voters are in favour of a ban on the burka.

- Home affairs minister Piet Hein Donner on Thursday announced the government would distance itself from the idea of a multicultural society. It is up to immigrants to integrate into Dutch society and general policy on schooling, jobs and housing gives them ample opportunity, he said.

Dutch society and its values must take precedence, he said. There would be a tougher approach to people who ignore Dutch values or disobey the law. He wants to introduce a law making forced marriage illegal and tougher measures on the way immigrants dress, which could include a burka ban.


- Dutch society and its values must take precedence and integration policy should go, home affairs minister Piet Hein Donner told parliament on Thursday evening during the presentation of his integration bill.


-Donner wants an end to integration policy and a tougher approach to people who ignore Dutch values or disobey the law. He is planning to introduce a law making forced marriage illegal and he wants tougher measures for immigrants who lower their chance of employment by the way they dress.



In response, somebody wrote the below comment on one of the articles, and I think it is actual social commentary GOLD. I wish I could meet this person and shake their hand because it's just so true, it's actual side splittingly hilarious.

I have roughly translated the key dutch words in brackets for the sake of understanding.

"The Dutch governement should absolutely revoke the residence permits of anyone who doesn't ride an oma fiets (typical dutch bike), who doesn't eat a broodje kaaas (cheese sandwhich) everyday for lunch except on fridays, who doesn't use the words 'lekker' (delicious) and 'leuk'(nice) as their prime vocabulary, all men who don't wear ill-fitting suits and pointy brown shoes, all women over 30 who don't look more like men than men do, all those who know how to queue, who don't bump into everyone the pass in the streets, who go to concerts to talk through it, and anyone who isn't absolutely boorish."

By NotImpressed | June 17, 2011 10:21 AM