Yo ho ho.

White guys

Made by me. They are my new thing.

Lessons in

... How to destroy a brand....

- Have a bunch of 50 year old people with no experience in branding, or feelings or idea about the definition of "alignment" get together in a room and do a dance I like to call the "political hot shoe shuffle", while simulataneously waving their dicks in the air at any chance they get.


... How to lose career confidence....

- Sit in a room with people of above nature and realise that whoever screams louder and for longer will get what they want. End of story.


... How to blow off some steam....

- Go to Karnivale in Cologne and just pretend for 30 hours that none of this matters when it really really grates on you.

Je ne l'aime pas.

It comes in waves.

But when it comes, it's quite a strong feeling.

It passes, but it returns often.

The annoyance I get when I realise my mother was wrong and should have let me take French in highschool instead of Chinese.

Which I failed.

Even though I regularly cheated.

Everything cool is either German or French.

Bah!

Ick. IKEA.

Inside a large maze of fake rooms
Kids are lost, wailing "Mummy?"
Everything needs instructions
A lively buzz fueled by meatballs

- written by me as a poetical wrap of my first single IKEA experience.

I went to IKEA today to buy a new bed since I am moving house at the end of the week and the bed frame I have now belongs to the house.

I felt so strange buying a bed. I am so furniture adverse for the consequences of moving and owning such hefty items.

I walked into IKEA and broke out in a cold sweat seeing young families, young couples, heavily pregnant women contemplating cots, and young men thinking about home office systems.

People that have settled down.

Then I chose a bed with storage options underneath it and I was frazzled for about an hour. Then we went and had Swedish meatballs and fries in the cafeteria and I calmed down a little bit.

Everything here is so uncertain. I have concerns about my visa being out of date when I turn 30 in 5 months time because of the salary conditions that come with it.

All I want is just one more year.

Danger zone

A colleague just said the exact same thing I was thinking, about a highly personal matter.

It freaked me out a little bit.

"Get out of my head...," I told her "It's not a safe place to be."

The quiet life

I have been staying in quite a bit lately and it's been really good for my soul.

Taking the time while my friends have been away to just be in, not worry about where my bike is, or rush around.

I have the first mass gathering tonight since the middle of December, a warm up "Homecoming dinner." party. (since not everyone is back yet.)

My tasks for today?

Clean my room and buy a chicken that will feed 8.

New Years Eve Road trip

View Larger Map

Germany!

Cologne never disappoints!

Fire crackers and fireworks on the street, Kölsch, super cute German boys, the Ronettes, Knudels and Beef!

A night of irony

I gate crashed my friend Amanda's office Christmas party last night.

Well, to be honest, it wasn't just me. It was me and all my friends.

They had an "Awful Christmas jumper" dress up theme.

I wore a new jacket which was kind of woolly. When I walked in, someone Amanda works with said "Ha ha, nice ironic jacket."

My friend and I just looked at each other, in full knowledge this is something I seriously wear normally.

They had karaoke happening, and for every song you sung, you got a free shot.

I sang the Backstreet boys at about 1am, as a duet with another guy.

A group of Swedish girls came up to me after I had jumped off stage and sunk my shot.

"That was the best - Our cheeks are cramping from laughing so hard at you guys!!!"

We rocked that stage.

Hopeless adult

09:49 am, 9 Dec
Me

"Dawg, I went to the ATM this morning to get my new cleaner some $$. It was out of order. So I had to raid the piggy bank. 15 EU in coins. ( Plenty of 5 cent coins included) I am such a hopeless adult. "


10:47, 9 Dec
Friend

"I don't agree. You adapted admirably to an unforseen situation. Thinking on your feet. Bravo!"

Technically speaking

L.O: Did you just say that?

Me: What?

L.O: You had the opposite of a "gang bang" at your house today?

Me: Yes, that's what I said.

L.O: What does that even mean?

Me: We were hungover so we all had a little nap side by side on the floor of my living room.

L.O: How many of you?

Me: I don't know... four? You know, because it was so damn innocent, almost like Sunday version of a kindergarden nap time.

L.O's boyfriend: Actually, the opposite of a gang bang would technically be reading the Financial Times, alone.

First video interview

Interview and video direction by me.

Physalia motion design studio: interview from SubmarineChannel on Vimeo.

Voidness

Sorry that there has been a blank void in the space where I should be filling you in on my latest ramblings.

I wasn't aware that so many people were that interested, but some people have been quite vocal about the silence.

I have a heap of photos, media and things to write about so in terms of content, got plenty of that.

One of me BFF's from Australia who now lives in London is arriving tonight at 10pm, so I doubt that this weekend will be the one where I disclose my shenanigans online, but hopefully soon.

Museum N8

Museum N8. aka Museum night, is when all the museums in Amsterdam (and in some other dutch cities) are open until 2am, and they host events, parties, DJs, bands and you get to hang out and see everything and party.

This year's agenda wasn't as compelling (compared to last year) but I always wanted to go, so I went anyway. And it wasn't as good as I thought it would be, but nonetheless, an experience.

Over heard whilst leaving a lame museum....

Guy: Well, I mean, let's not forget the reason we're all here...
Girl: (perkily) The alcohol?
Guy: (confused) Err. No... the art...

Idea. It's Free.

It occurred to me the other day that I am probably going through my second adolescence in Amsterdam.

Getting things out of my system that I never got to do, in order to be a (hopefully) more balanced, more stable adult who will have no regrets and then one day be with another well balanced, stable adult.

Together, there may be a chance we could create, rear, guide and nourish well balanced and stable children.

Getting things out of my system is one thing that could happen, or the other thing that could happen is that it becomes a way of life...

Anyway why would I think that I'm living the life of a pubescent teenager straight out of a Judy Blume novel, you may ask?

Well because I spend my free time gladly making things like this:

Not exactly what the kids in Judy Blume books were getting up to, but a little juvenile nonetheless, non?

This kind of activity is not something people with white-collar corporate jobs do, at this age.

People in normal corporate white collar corporate jobs go to the gym, learn how to bake, watch a leisurely game of tennis or perhaps play squash after hours.

They don't make stencil art.

In case you haven't been keeping up to speed, what you see above is the result of a thought I had one day at the office which I wrote in this post.

But I don't care.

Adolescence number #2 is proving to be an interesting time indeed.

Email exchange

Thursday 11 August 11:30 am
From: LadyGrey@workemail.com
To: DutchMaleFlatmate@gmail.com

I would like to have some friends over for a little get together in the living room/kitchen - 4-5 people? Is this ok? noone will stay the night, just drinking and possibly dancing.



Thursday 11 August 11:34 am
From: DutchMaleFlatmate@gmail.com
To: LadyGrey@workemail.com

Dancing? In the living room / kitchen? Wow. :)
Ok for me. I'll be at home friday/saturday. Out on sunday, back late afternoon.


Thursday 11 August 11:45 am
From: LadyGrey@workemail.com
To: DutchMaleFlatmate@gmail.com

Swing dancing!! We are getting dressed up... will you be home Saturday night? Want to join? Anyway, I am going to put on some hapjes and move the couch and play music from the 1940s.

KIJK MAAR!!

Watch from 2:38

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0BHxhUnokU


Thursday 11 August 12:04 am
From: DutchMaleFlatmate@gmail.com
To: LadyGrey@workemail.com

I think you should quit drinkin alcohol during working hours...


:)

Here we go again

I live for the nights that I can’t remember,

with the people I won’t forget

spending all the money I just work my ass off

for doing things that I won't regret

"Show me a good time" - Drake

(Don't like the song, but the sentiment is spot on.)

Bring it. Just bring it.

I wrote a short piece on one of my friends who is an artist, with his permission, and submitted it to a great arts and trends blog that has decent exposure in NYC and in Austalia.

I love his stuff and think he is exceptionally talented. And a super nice guy.

The blog, Lost in E Minor, picked up my piece and published it late on Sunday night (my time) about 8 hours after I wrote it. (Australian morning.)

Then they tweeted it. To over 10,000 followers.

I tweeted it. To about 150 followers.

Then I told my friend and he put it on his facebook page. ( His art page and his personal page, and he credited me in his foreword, which also drove traffic to my newly updated blog project.)

Then he tweeted it, and then the blog retweeted his tweet to the same 10,000 followers.

Then I put it on my facebook page.

Then his/our friends started to spread the link on facebook.

The friends of our friends picked it up on facebook and share it and one of them works for the Amsterdam city council marketing department, I amsterdam, who are by the way, a phenomenal brand in their own right, especially in the field of social media.

(As a marketer and a consumer and someone who lives in the city, I enjoy their campaigns, and reading their website for what's on (it's also very user friendly) and enjoy interacting with them on facebook and twitter and the like.)

I amsterdam put it on their facebook wall infront of their 25,000 fans.

Call it serendipity, call it synchronicity, call it the power of social media. Whatever you want to call it, I don't care.

The Universe is providing.

The Lost in E Minor blog then agreed to let me write for them regularly for the love, glory and exposure.

Then my phone rang. It was a creative production house called Yellow Submarine, in Amsterdam. They heard about me through someone and they asked me if I would be interested in freelance writing for their regular company newsletters, FOR MONEY.

Of course I am interested!!

Then I got an email saying that a short piece I wrote and submitted for Lomography Magazine is going to be published on July 24th.

O-M-G: It’s all happening.

I just got back from Australia about 2 weeks ago.

Before I left, I told my friend Amber that I was on the brink of something, something that felt good, something that felt real and something that felt right.

I think this is the something.

I am, in a word, floating.

The $64 question

I'm home for a little while, for the first time in 2 years.

I haven't seen my parents in 1.5 years, since I went to Indonesia to visit them.

I picked my parents up from the airport this morning, and I went to hug my mother.

The first things she said to me mid-hug?

"Hi darling...... Are you still drunk (from last night)?"

Wow mum. Wow.

(For the record, no, I wasn't.)

Corporations: where creativity goes to die.

I told a good friend/colleague today about an idea I had for a stencil I wanted to make for some guerilla street art. It just came to me as I sat down to my computer today.

When I showed it to her, she said "I don't get."

I asked her what's not to get.

And she said " What is it supposed to do? Are YOU going to paint these somewhere? And if so, where?"

"On the side of this office building." I retorted.

Her mouth gaped open in shock.

"I'm kidding." I sighed. And I walked back to my desk and kept typing.

Fucking corporate types.